1 Peter 1 Friendship

1Peter 1:5-9 His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But if anyone does not have them, he is nearsighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins.

 I read this tonight and it hit me hard about the life that God has called us to live. I must admit for many years I always felt that the Christian faith was about just the freedom that Christ give you. But with that freedom we also must understand that there is a standard that God has called us to live up too.

If I was to write my biggest fault and the one that almost everyone points out is the fact I forget and lose stuff. I must admit it bothers be allot when people point it out all the time, because it is one of those things that I know without someone else saying it all the time. I hate that I forget things and lose stuff. I believe it is an area that I need to work on and continue. I guess the reason I feel that way is because I always felt less then up to just a few months ago. I would spend so much time finding fault in me to where I only did what I knew what I was good at. I believe if I was to sit down with you and say what my gift is I would have to say friendship.

When I read this verse today I started thinking about that. I love doing things with people I care about and love. Always making that relationship stronger and doing things. It's funny I try to be hard about things, but I end up giving in. I read for this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love. I start to think about those relationships that we have with one another. I also start to think about my relationship with God. I believe that part of having a relationship with God is knowing what he wants you to do.

I believe we throw around the word "calling" way to much and forget that God desires you to be who he made you to be. When I went to new york this spring break I was just amazed with the amount of history that was with in that place. I think about our country and how many people that has helped us get to where we are at now. To look at the pew that Washington worshiped at brought tears to my eyes. To stand where humans lost their life on 9/11 and to hear stories about that day just amazes me. In the same way I believe God is amazed and loves when we live the best we can. Setting aside what we are bad at and building on what we are good at.

This is going to sound weird but I love our youth worship team. I love it because it is raw and struggling but God is getting glory out of it. When I get into a car with a kid and he ask "how did I sound?" I get to point them to what true worship is. I say all the time, it's not about me or you it is about God. Where was your heart at? Because of that rawness and not being the "best" buy trying to understand something new opens the door to the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

I love working with a kid who his raw and their faith is all sorts of messed up, but they are open to change and the gospel. To me it's just like that worship team, it always starts with I but I have the chance to point it back to God. I am not sure why I got that gift, but I know that God wants to use it. I become excited when the Gospel changes a life for good. I care nothing about the spiritual high that the kid might get on, but I do care about the changes they are making.

This is where I am going to be honest about where I was at last year. I was burned out and tired because I was trying to be God of my life. I had kids coming in and to be honest I didn't like them anymore. I felt that it was nothing but drama and some how I lost a passion. I knew I was wrong, but didn't want to admit it to anyone. I did what I could to get by and went on in life. I was living day by day with no vision of growing, learning, and compassion. I guess you can say I forgot my purpose and who I was living for.

To make a long story short it took a 15 year old to help me understand what it was that God called me too. I felt that I was getting to old for youth ministry which is a lie from Satan. I was thinking maybe it was a different group of kids I needed to work with. I started idolizing those youth pastors who talked about how good their group was. One night at camp after a event that I would rather forget about, but can't...I am talking with this kid in tears saying "I can't get baptize I am to bad." I broke and asked myself "what have I been teaching." The next day we baptized him and today he is a leader with in our group. Today he will tell you that what changed him the most was the compassion I had. I have had the chance to tell him he help change my life.

I read that in 1 Peter that our job is not to be the best but a person of compassion and love. I have to say it took me breaking to understand where I was at. I talked with several people about it, coming clean to my pastor was hard but the most freedom. I told him that I wanted to love again like I did before. I pray that God continues to break my heart from now on with this area.