2011 Expectations

Wow, 2011 is just a few weeks away. Yesterday morning in our staff meeting we talked about some new ways of doing things. Really I guess it's not new, it is how Jesus did things. Chad asked that we would blog about our 2011 Expectations for our ministry.

It was one year ago that I spent a couple of weeks off of work and placed myself in a position where I didn't do anything with Church, work, or even with people outside the holidays. I guess I never really knew the fruit that would come from that. I had A LOT of anger in my soul and heart that I really needed to deal with. God started breaking me and showing me his love for me and his love for his people.

As I write this I am already almost in tears, because I believe there is nothing more lonely then battling something alone and making the choice to do so. For the first time in my life I was unsure on my purpose and what I was even going to do. I felt I was the only one and couldn't be honest with anyone about it. You have to understand I have always had goals for myself and wanted to prove I could do something.

After finally going to people and saying I have this issue and I don't know what to do about it. Finally it hit me, I am the problem. Everything I had done had been through my power with just a little help from God. For the first time I was going to need a miracle in my life to take place and I couldn't do anything about it. I know longer had a drive or a passion for anything.

I started to see day by day a little more of God's calling and not my calling for my own life. I started to believe that my days as a youth pastor were not numbered and it was a high calling from God. God started showing me that they needed to see my true side and not my performance side. Mission Abilene and Abilene, Texas is what I was going to call home until he says something different. I believe with all my heart something is going to take place in the next year or so that is going to change my life forever...but I am not to pack up and leave though.

So what would I like to see in 2011?

• We grow in a deeper relationship with Jesus and not Church! 
• We understand that God's grace is what calls us back home to him! 
• Worship would take priority in the most unusual ways! 
• That he would show us the passion that he has for us! 

I felt God was pushing me to send this teacher at Abilene High an email thanking him for what he has done with some of my students. One student in particular, I will not give the teachers name but his response back to me was touching....

"You're right: We need this encouragement, both as teachers and youth ministers. As a teacher,

often I measure "success" in averages and tests scores, so it's easier, sadly, to forget about

Kingdom success sometimes. I have to pray the Lord constantly remind me of the real and bigger

calling as a teacher. Every once and a while the Lord graciously provides a student who's so ready

to be called back to the Lord, but they don't see it. The ability to partner with the Lord and men of

God like you in this is incredible."  

So I do not have any number goals at all? How many students will I take to camp? Not sure, how many new students would I like to see come? Those who God brings through our students praying and seeing the need for the lord to do a work in their life. My success can not be built on a number, it has to be built on the kingdom of heaven.

I want to do more with NO credit at all. I want to continue to encourage other christian's who work with teens to keep up the good work. It is SO easy to forget the purpose that God has placed in front of us. But we must always remember that God has something different!

Last is this, to continue to make our youth group as much of a family as possible. This method and style has brought a great deal of change into our group. We keep people because of this...that is why I post pictures and videos all the time. They love it and they connect that way!

I pray that God would just bless us! I am always inspired by music. The whole time I have had this song on repeat! This is a theme song for Paradox Student Ministries!

The Greatest Gift

I have to admit I am not really into allot of material stuff. I believe allot of times that is what we believe a gift is. But I find a gift to be more then something that will end up in the trash at some point. A gift has the ability to bring life to someone and best example is Christ on the cross. So if I was to pick the best gift, this is what I would say...

A little over a month ago a six year prayer was answered. I had always wanted to see a high school student lead a junior high student to Christ. I wanted to see this because I have a huge heart for the older leading the younger and teaching that is a part of God's will. Many times the American style is each man for his own and we have kids growing up fast and not sure what to do.

So a month ago it was in the Alsups parking lot on North 10th when a conversation between a junior high student and myself went into what would be a day that I will never forget. A High school student is in the van as I am driving and talking he starts to share his heart. Next thing I know we are all in tears and we pull over into the parking lot and he said he wanted to ask Jesus into his heart.

I can say that seeing that and see the relationship they still have will be a memory and gift I will take to heaven with me. For the last couple of years God has taken me and has broke me and has shown me what it means to be a follower of Christ. Being a follower means will you obey no matter what and do what he ask you to do out of the love you have for Christ. Many times to include myself we tend to make excuses for what we do and go on.

As I saw this take place I really had a small glimpse of what Christ says when he tells us to make disciples. I was an awesome gift to see God's will unfold before my eyes. I will have to admit I was crying when I saw it.

If I could change anything?

Out of all the places I have been I must say New York was one of my favorite places to go. I loved it for many different reasons. The biggest was the multiple cultures in one small area. As I looked around at all the history in NY, one thing stuck out to me. What use to be a dream for some people has turned into a nightmare.

I am a fan of liberty and I believe in the power of making choices. I love america and all the good we do around the world. I know when you look around at times it seems we are not doing anything, but we really are. There is one thing I dislike about our country though. It's the american dream that has slowly turned into a nightmare for some people.

Over the last few years I have watched people work their lives away and try to cover up their problems with money and stuff. I have seen people to include myself justify themselves for spending and trying to keep up with the jones'. It would be easy to point the finger at someone and say it is their fault, but in reality the fault belongs to all of us.

I remember stories about my mother and father that shared a burrito while my mom was pregnant with me. They were a young couple without a high school education. My dad who was a hard worker, worked in the oilfield, my mother stayed home.  At a young age my dad desired this american dream and though this is what was going to make him happy. He made a good living for my family, but at the same time missed out on allot.

I never really got into sports growing up because I didn't have him around to teach me. I didn't understand the game at all, so I just never really got into it. I do not have a clue of how to work on a car because once again I was taught. My father would work 60 to 70 hour weeks. When he was home, he was asleep. Please hear me my dad thought he was doing the right thing. He bought me stuff all the time, he didn't know I was crying out for quality time.

Now several years later I look around and I see the issue is still there. I believe in working and to be honest I hate to not be busy. I have a fear at times though we have forgot what we are here for. Are calling is to give God the glory and not our pocketbooks, closets, garages, and whatever else. We are here for relationships and I don't mean just relationships with your social class. It make me ANGRY when I see people judge someone because of social class. I have to be careful, because those who have everything and like to show it off I tend to judge. Part of it is because I have a strong belief now that the way God meant for this to work is that we put others before us.

The american dream now shows that we should be first and then we give the left overs. The hard part of this whole blog is that I AM GUILTY! I pray daily that God would continue to break me of being selfish.

I have showed this before and I have now made this picture my background for my computer. It is a prayer I should pray and I don't....

The young man that wrote this is fatherless and motherless at the age of 17. He supported by Compassion International. The little shack he lives in Compassion bought for him. In the slum we start to find hope because of the love of Jesus.

As you leave please watch this video, it is only one minute! You will notice he says Nick in the video...I am not his sponsor but it hit me hard because I felt God used it to speak to me and about my prayer life.