It was one year ago that I spent a couple of weeks off of work and placed myself in a position where I didn't do anything with Church, work, or even with people outside the holidays. I guess I never really knew the fruit that would come from that. I had A LOT of anger in my soul and heart that I really needed to deal with. God started breaking me and showing me his love for me and his love for his people.
As I write this I am already almost in tears, because I believe there is nothing more lonely then battling something alone and making the choice to do so. For the first time in my life I was unsure on my purpose and what I was even going to do. I felt I was the only one and couldn't be honest with anyone about it. You have to understand I have always had goals for myself and wanted to prove I could do something.
After finally going to people and saying I have this issue and I don't know what to do about it. Finally it hit me, I am the problem. Everything I had done had been through my power with just a little help from God. For the first time I was going to need a miracle in my life to take place and I couldn't do anything about it. I know longer had a drive or a passion for anything.
I started to see day by day a little more of God's calling and not my calling for my own life. I started to believe that my days as a youth pastor were not numbered and it was a high calling from God. God started showing me that they needed to see my true side and not my performance side. Mission Abilene and Abilene, Texas is what I was going to call home until he says something different. I believe with all my heart something is going to take place in the next year or so that is going to change my life forever...but I am not to pack up and leave though.
So what would I like to see in 2011?
- We grow in a deeper relationship with Jesus and not Church!
- We understand that God's grace is what calls us back home to him!
- Worship would take priority in the most unusual ways!
- That he would show us the passion that he has for us!
often I measure "success" in averages and tests scores, so it's easier, sadly, to forget about
Kingdom success sometimes. I have to pray the Lord constantly remind me of the real and bigger
calling as a teacher. Every once and a while the Lord graciously provides a student who's so ready
to be called back to the Lord, but they don't see it. The ability to partner with the Lord and men of
God like you in this is incredible."
So I do not have any number goals at all? How many students will I take to camp? Not sure, how many new students would I like to see come? Those who God brings through our students praying and seeing the need for the lord to do a work in their life. My success can not be built on a number, it has to be built on the kingdom of heaven.
I want to do more with NO credit at all. I want to continue to encourage other christian's who work with teens to keep up the good work. It is SO easy to forget the purpose that God has placed in front of us. But we must always remember that God has something different!
Last is this, to continue to make our youth group as much of a family as possible. This method and style has brought a great deal of change into our group. We keep people because of this...that is why I post pictures and videos all the time. They love it and they connect that way!
I pray that God would just bless us! I am always inspired by music. The whole time I have had this song on repeat! This is a theme song for Paradox Student Ministries!
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